Living with drug addiction
A mother's story
When you find out your child is addicted to drugs, it’s like walking into the house of someone you don’t know very well and breaking one of their priceless antiques.
You don’t know what you’re doing or how it happened. You ask yourself, was it an accident? Or should I have been more careful? You can try to fix it but you don’t know where to start. You can throw money at it, apologise a thousand times, cry or get defensive, and you’ll still be picking up the pieces a week later. Everything has changed. As much as you want to forget about it or wish it never happened, it’s a mess and things can’t go back to the way they were.
When I found out my son was using heroin every day, sometimes three or four times a day, that’s how I felt. He was in his early twenties, living at home and going to uni. I found out later, he had failed a few subjects and dropped out. He was always asking me for money and after a while, when I stopped giving it to him, my jewellery went missing. Two overdoses, Hepatitis C, and an armed robbery later, he told me he needed help. But it took a few more years of being in and out of rehab, trying to withdraw by switching to alcohol, cannabis or methadone, and going to NA meetings, before he finally stopped using drugs.
My son is in jail now. I have no idea what will happen when he comes out, but for now, he’s okay. People should think of addiction as a disease that doesn’t have a cure yet. You can treat it and it can lie dormant for years, but then flare up again. You can’t really prepare yourself for it. All you can do is be patient, forgiving, and try to get the most out of every day. When my son sends me a birthday card or calls to say he loves me, I stay in that moment for as long as I can.
Story supplied by Turning Point.
The Brain
